— 2017 Silver Poetry Award—
All, I Am Not – Konstantin Nicholas Rega
So here I am
of ashes and earth
……from exploded stars
…………with their electric greens
…………their dusty beaten golds
……in that toxic spill
…………of polluted blues
…………by city-light-galaxies
A train is derailed outside
my apartment window.
It reminds me of some pop-icon
all that conflated caterwauling
propelling the next hot air balloon:
always missing the moon least to
say the other deaf and dumb stars.
I’m sure if I connected them
(that child still peeking
from across 18th Street) they
would spill those back-of-the-throat
secrets, for I am tired of taking
so-called lemon lozenges that my
Veterinarian prescribes with a grin.
But then the TV roars and the radio
pushes its own “for-the-masses” message
as I watch a small girl hopscotch by—
firetrucks sirens returning us to white static.
This sick soft exhaustion
in my outstretched lungs
……bared and silver-veined wings
…………taking off with every gasp
…………landing at the once-loved sigh
……that cannot be cured by medicine
…………bloodied blackbird
…………without a wind.
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Every word in a poem is at the poet’s expense: this is my philosophy. This poem is influenced by the New York School of Poetry; it is about the individual facing off against a world that is changing, though it is ironically constant in that “changing”. I am a 19-year-old student at The University of Kent in Canterbury, England studying British & American Literature and Creative Writing. I was born in Krasnoyarsk, Russia. — Konstantin Nicholas Rega
